A Twit

I’m currently in one. (A twit, that is.)

If you don’t know what that is, you need to come down South, but I’ll tell you this – it isn’t pretty.

Let’s just say that a group of 18-year-olds and the 4-week  “Who’s on First” routine we’ve been playing with the air-conditioning repair man have caused my last two nerves to rub together in an entirely unpleasant manner.

ENTIRELY.  UNPLEASANT.

So I’ll share some random musings from the last couple of days

1.  Why did God ever give children the ability to sigh?  Or roll their eyes?  It seems that those are dangerous talents for a child to practice.  I can see where they could very possibly be fatal.

2.  G has grown so much in the last year that he owns more khaki pants than The Gap.  He’s also gotten really skinny, and subsequently he’s lost his rear-end.  Now he looks like a frog who stood up and put pants on. 

That is all I can say about him as he has given me strict instructions never to speak of him publicly again.  Except to announce that I may call him Kermit for a while.

3.  As I type, AC is working on homework with her iPod in her ears.  She’s singing “Eye of the Tiger.”  And she’s not doing it well.  She has many gifts; carrying a tune is not one of them. 

Oh, and yes I am a teacher, and I am vehemently opposed to music while they do their homework.  But talking is one of her gifts, and she hones it incessantly, loudly, and with great passion.  ALL THE TIME.  I needed some silence.  Thus the iPod and so she’s singing…badly.

 My word for the day? 

Counterintuitive.

4.  The “Top Headlines” for today:  “Spokesman: Politics wasn’t a factor in Obama’s remarks about building a mosque near Ground Zero,”  “Man, 78, Rides Roller Coaster 90 Times in Day,”  and “Mel Gibson Crashes Maserati:  Gibson loses control of his expensive Italian sports car and crashes it into a hillside.”

Please allow me to comment:

a.  Mr. Obama, it was political; I don’t know much about you, but I know this- everything is political.  It was also emotional, spiritual, and insensitive- and we know you are aware of that.  We’d like you to stop.

b.  What’s even more fascinating than a 78 year old man spending hours on a roller coaster is this- there is a group called “National Coasters Association” and they publish a  journal…with articles…about roller coasters.  Huh.

c.  Hey Mel, there’s a movie you should watch…I think it’s called The Passion.  You should check it out, there may be something there for you.  Seems like you’re struggling a bit.  I’m just saying…

5.  I’m thinking about renaming Ivy (one of our dogs) Diana the Huntress.  Wednesday she caught a snake and a possum. She didn’t want to let the possum go.  Instead, she preferred to carry it around like a baby;  a “cumongous” baby (as my nephew H. would say).  She did finally release it so that it could go on its merry way. 

Consequently, it was a  thankful possum…until last night when Ivy caught her again, and  this time all the babies tried to crawl out of her pouch.  Then they saw Ivy, and  they quickly tucked tail and ran back into the womb.

6.  And y’all, I dropped to my knees right then and thanked God audibly because while he did give children the ability to roll their eyes and sigh, He did NOT give them ability to tuck tail and climb back in the mother ship.

 That might have put me over the edge.

See y’all!

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3 Comments on A Twit

  1. HoodMama
    August 17, 2010 at 9:36 am (8 years ago)

    You are hilarious! I want to be a fly on your wall and witness firsthand all the nonsense.

    Reply
  2. Ice Cream Queen of FuYah
    August 17, 2010 at 9:38 am (8 years ago)

    Okay, I hopped over here from your comment on Sophie’s site – may I just say that you have captured my last four weeks in one numbered comment – number 1 of course…my 12 almost 13 yo daughter is giving us the sigh/eye-roll combination on a way too often basis. I may have to break out my own iPod just to stay away from bodily harm….AGGHHHHHH – i scream. Anyway – I’ll be a regular reader from now on girl – you rock!
    Wow is that ever a run-on sentence…i think having teenagers does that to one.

    Reply

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