A 3 Hour Tour

Someone (me) thought that a canoe trip would be a perfect way to spend a glorious fall day in Tennessee.  Someone (still me) was right, for the most part.
When you throw six children ranging in age from 14 to 4 into the fray, you’d better be ready for almost anything. 
And we were.  I packed Oreos and Capri Suns- all would be well.
I need to preface this by saying I am more than thankful that this adventure did not end with a trip to the ER, but I will tell you that Coach navigated us into a tree where my ear was nearly ripped off.  He thought he was so funny when he told me not to worry, I didn’t use my ears much anyway.
I told him that was an awfully brave statement for a man sitting in a canoe with an injured woman armed with a canoe paddle.
The trip started out smoothly enough, and how much can possibly happen on a 7 mile trip?  The little canoe guy told us it would take about 3 hours.
Or, six and a half, but as you can see below- AC is totally cool with the entire thing and is giving the universal thumbs up.  I, however, became quite concerned that the Oreos wouldn’t satiate for much longer than 3 hours.
I was right.
Moments later they had managed to run their boat on the lone rock in the middle of the river.  They are a talented trio.
Obviously, V did not see the humor in the situation.  AC was tentative, and a bit irritated, G found it hilarious.  And I laughed so hard my water broke….
And I’m not pregnant.
We, and by “we” I mean Coach and my brother, got them off the rock and we continued on down the river.  You can see the enthusiasm on AC’s face. 
She is occasionally moody.  And she’s not really shy about letting people know how she feels.  It’s a dubious characteristic at best.  It is best treated with Oreos.
G decided a good splash from the paddle would shut her up.  It looks like it might work…
I take that back.  It did NOT work.  And there weren’t enough Oreos on the planet to appease her once she reached the ugly cry.
So, she ended up convalescing on the couch and having a hissy fit about nature and leaves and snakes and rivers.   
We were planning an overnight canoe/camping trip.
Now we’re not.
The End.
See y’all!

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